why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

Boom.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

Whats the difference between and anti joke and a joke? There two different things.

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

Whats Obama's last name?

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

17

A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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