when i walk in the living room this is what i see... Luci's big eyes are stairing at me! (Luci is a dog) (Pita is a cat) I start a hissing and a scratchin and i ain't affrid to bite her, bite her, bite her, I"M PITA AND I KNOW IT!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +40

STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

thumb_up thumb_down +40

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

thumb_up thumb_down

What did one guy in the bar say to the other? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

thumb_up thumb_down -46

A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

240

thumb_up thumb_down +23

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops