Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

How much does a mexican immigrant get paid? Less an minimum wage.

Why did the bus drop a boy holding ice cream? Its driver was not paying full attention on the road and was sentenced 15 years for manslaughter.

What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

What did nike say to addidas? Hi

What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

Juggling lions and breast feeding.

A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

What are the four season of Canada? Cold, cold, cold and road work.

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

5

Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

What time is it? I believe it's half past 10, sir. Damn, I'm late for a meeting. May I ask, what time are you supposed to be there? 11 O'clock Why sir you have half an hour left. No shiitt, sherlock

I scream You scream We all scream For dead babies

Your mother is so fat. But I'm fine with it.

did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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