A: Knock Knock.. B: Who's there? A: John B: John Who? A: Shut the hell up, i'm masturbating.

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

What do you call a black man in church? Religious

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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