What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

What's better than a worm in your apple? No worms in your apple.

They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

What did the mexican get for his brthday? A potatoe

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

Steve: Hey ask me if Im a Pelican. Bob: Are you a pelican? Steve: YES.

How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

Womens rights.

what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

Two blondes are out for a walk when they come across some tracks, they realise they are train tracks and move out of the way to make sure they aren't hit by a train.

two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

Why did sally break her arm? A piano fell on her

What is worse than a baby nailed to a tree? The holocaust. What is worse than 20 babies nailed to a tree? A baby nailed to 20 trees.

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

Why we in a Falln tank!!!? Be cause the plane exploded!!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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