Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

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what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

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How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

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What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

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If there are 500 bricks in an airplane and one falls out how many are there in he plane? 499. Name 3 steps to get a Elephant in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2. Put the Elephant in the fridge 3. Close the fridge Name 4 steps to get an Deer in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2.Take the Elephant out of the fridge 3. Put the Deer in the fridge 4. Close the fridge The Lion King is having a birthday party. Every animal came, besides one. Who was it? The Deer. Because hes trapped in the Fridge. The Deer manages to escape the fridge, and hes running late. he encounters Crocodile lake. How will he cross it? He will swim through it because the Crocodiles are at the Lion Kings birthday. Then suddenly, The Deer dies. How? The Brick hit him.

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What is hotter than two girls making out? The Sun.

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Steven Yuhasz is so homosexual, he has sexual intercourse with other men and enjoys it. <33

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

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A drunk guy walks into a bar and falls flat on his back. Upset, he then finds a bathroom. An hour later he is arrested for beating off in the bathroom. off is pressing charges.

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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Q: Why did the horse put on cologne? A: He wanted to smell nice.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

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alert("The Game");//

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What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

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why did the girl fall of the swing because she was pushed of by obama

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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