Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

who farted? umm........that guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Name two things that are stupid and can get stupider. You can't , there's only one a blonde

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +123

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's your name? You tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +47

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops