once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

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o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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but there is a road to the super market

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Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

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What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

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Black people are innocent.

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A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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8=>

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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