A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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