Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

Yo Momma's so old... She has lived a great life and you should be very proud of her even though she is slowly dying of a degenerative disease.

A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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