Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

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A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

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elliot forsythe is a paedo

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

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There once was a man named Joe. Joe had AIDS, and killed all his friends and family The End, now go back to bed, pussy

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wanna hear a joke? katie chandler

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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''Wanna hear a joke?'' ''Sure'' ''a joke''

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Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

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What is Ash gray Battleship gray Black Blue-gray Cadet gray Charcoal Cool gray Davy's gray Payne's gray Gunmetal Silver Slate gray Taupe Purple taupe Medium taupe Rose quartz Taupe gray Timberwolf WhiteApple green Asparagus Bright green Cal Poly Chartreuse Dark olive green Dark spring green Dartmouth green Fern green Forest greenGreen Green-yellow Harlequin Honeydew Hunter green India green Islamic green Jungle green Lawn green LimePhthalo green Pigment green Pine green Pistachio Sea green Shamrock green Spring bud Spring green Teal Yellow-greenAlice blue Aqua Aquamarine Celeste Cerulean Cyan Electric blue Jungle green Magic mint MintAir Force blue Air superiority blue Alice blue Azure Baby blue Bleu de France Blue Blue-gray Bondi blue Brandeis blueAmethyst Byzantium Cerise Eggplant Fandango Fuchsia Heliotrope Indigo Lavender blush Lavender (floralblack gray silver white maroon red purple fuchsia green lime olive yellow navy blue teal aqua a List that you just spent 5 min reading

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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poop.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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