What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars except the duck.

I'm not here.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels for the loss of their newborn child.

Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock Knock, Who's There The Chicken

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

What did Lebron James say to Brad Pitt? "What's up, Brad?"

how do you teach a baby to walk? cut of its hands.

Q: Why was Sally sad? A: Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally.

yaa tsi tsup ari dik ari dull an dik ari dill an dits tan dool la dippyduppy dull la roop uttyroopy la goorigan gook aya gittygangool arup cha cha adippydappydill la baritztandill lan den lan doe a barik kata barip pari baribadeebadeebadee standen lan doe ya baril las ten lan day a doe la babadeadevadevadevaduv ya vou what is that little las day lan doe badakadagadaga doo doo day a doe

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

How do you make lady gaga angry? punch her in the face and throw her off a cliff

Why did the black guy fail his math test? Because he did not study enough and as a result was no prepared to take a test on that material.

Why did the girl not have a good New Year's? She was murdered on Christmas.

wow garlic, yum

mitchell likes balls in his mouth.

Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice carton? She was trying to read the nutrition label and had forgotten her reading glasses.

A baby seal walks into a club.

only in america: does pizza arrive at your house faster than an ambulence do banks leave their doors open and chain their pens to the desks people put their usless junk in the garage and thier expensive cars in the driveway

whats funny? small ginger girls who die there head red, then it turns ginger again

Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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