What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

roses are red violets are blue cookie monster is gonna eat you big bird is yellow you look mellow dont forget elmo to

*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

Atheism

Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

How did the boy compliment the girl? He told her she had a lot of breasts. In return, she told him he had many penises.

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

8--------------------- penis

Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

what's better than winning the special olympics?.. Not being retarded

live or die you decide to late time to die

Often, Asians argue that they can speak properly... Like instead of L's, they use "R's." Sure... http://eng.tekkenpedia.com/wiki/Leo#Introduction

What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

Why is a chicken coupe, a coupe not a sedan? Because a sedan would have four doors.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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