How did the black person die? Of old age

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Q. Why is Italy shaped like a boot? A. Do you think they could fit all that shit in a tennis shoe?

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Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family...

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What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

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You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

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A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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How do you confuse a blond? Look at her

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Hurricane Sandy should be named A-Rod. Cuz he dosent hit anything

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops