knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

What do you a call a guy on steroids? A Body Builder

Q: What did the man do when he won the lottery? A: He kept it for himself and left his family.

Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

Why did the koala bear fall outta the tree? He died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?? He was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?? He had no arms. Why did the fourth koala fall out of the tree?? He thought it was a race to the bottom. Why did the fifth koala fall out of the tree?? Peer Pressure.

Keep up the fun Nero!

Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

What is worse than using the toilet and then realising there's no toilet paper? A racially motivated massacre.

Q: what did 7 say to 11? A: weres every one else?

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

Why'd the boy fall off his bike? The holocaust

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Knock knock Who's there? It's me, Dave. You still wanna go to the movies? Oh, yeah...let me grab my wallet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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