boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

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What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

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Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

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Potato.

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How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

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Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

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Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a cupcake and she enjoyed it.

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Why can't Helen Keller hear? She's dead

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Women's Sports

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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What do you call a black airman? A pilot!

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Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops