You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

What happened to the baby that wondered into oncoming traffic? It got hit by a truck.

A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

Fire extinguishers are sexy.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

Gestapo.

I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

Yo' momma is like a hardware store, 25 cents for a screw!

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

I'm growing tired of all those ADD jokes. I have ADD, and I... ... what time is it?

The 19th Amendment

Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

a black guy leaves prison

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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