What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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hey how do you turn the Xbox controller off thats easy turn the xbox off.

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How do you differentiate a Canadian from an American ? The American will have an American Passport,while the Canadian will have a Canadian passport.

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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This is an anti joke. Please make it the bestest and most well likeded one on this site.

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I have Alzheimer's, i pee out gold, racoons

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What's the difference between Michael J. Fox and a blender? Michael J. Fox is a successful actor starring in many movies, and a blender is a kitchen appliance.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

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How many Asians did it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 Asians are just like every one else

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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Catholicism.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

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Why didn't the cab driver pick up the black man? Because the cab driver already had a passenger and it would be unprofessional to pick up another person.

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A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

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Vagina jokes aren't funny, period.

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

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What did the white father tell his mexicon son and his wife as he left for work bye

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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