How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The New York Giants

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

thumb_up thumb_down -10

knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's weirder than an asian? His dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops