Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

nock nock who's there is me u idiot we aranged this yesterday

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

Wats do you get when you combine a vampire and a ginger? Idk, who would pull that disgusting shit

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

What do you call an awesome school? St Heinrich's Law School (Teaching you to break the laws!)

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

roses are red violets are blue cookie monster is gonna eat you big bird is yellow you look mellow dont forget elmo to

People who do not realize the concept of this website, and write real jokes on it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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