What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Tall asians

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

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What's a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

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A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

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Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops