whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

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What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

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That's what she didn't say

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What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

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What do you get when you cross 3 men and a chainsaw? Answer: 2 and a half men

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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What is stupid? I would say you but these jokes are worse.

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

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I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

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What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

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balls

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Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

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When life gives you oranges, hit kidswith 'em.

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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You're momma's so fat..Oh wait she's not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops