Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

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What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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An Asian child flunks a test.

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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