Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When your scuba diving why do u jump off backwards beacause if u jump forwards than u witll still be in the boat!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I like the way he thinks. Too bad he has alzheimers.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A bear walked into a bar and said to the bartender," I'd li.........................ke one beer please. " The bartender replied, " Sure. But why the big pause? "

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Jesus: I will return. Hitler: Well I am back... Nazi as in Nazireth Bush: As I said I was elected by Gawd. Me: What? What about me? Seriously why did I put myself here? Id have three bullets with them in a room, and id still shoot you six times.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

im not as random as you think I- Potato

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Therefore no one knew why his name was Fuzzy Wuzzy.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

NASCAR

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops