Doctor, I keep imagining Doctors. *hayball rolls*

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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why so serious? because your too serious.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry, we don't allow horses in here." The horse then leaves.

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A tiger walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender gets him a drink because he would rather not get vigorously consumed by a mighty beast.

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Q: why did the plane crash? A: because jack daniels equals 7

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

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Communism is very bad........well........look at China's economy

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What is big, black, and hairy? A coconut.

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what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

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What do you call a Jewish police officer? It depends on if you are Mel Gibson or not.

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If a tree falls on a woman, and there's no one around to hear it, what was a tree doing in the kitchen?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I probably wouldn't.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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Why was the boy sad. Because he had been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and he had been told he has three days to live. That's why.

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did you here the one about the disabled downs child dying? of course you didn't that would be a horrible joke

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Knock knock Who's There? My name is Jeff

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was crossing the road it tripped on a rock. When it was getting back up, a bus went through a stop sign and ran it over. After suffering for 3 weeks in an animal hospital, the chicken died.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation can be known as fishing for compliments or reassurance of your value as a human being. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty jumped off and committed suicide.

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Three men are in prison and comparing crimes. The first says that he got three years and he never robbed that store. The second says he served six years and he never hit that lady. The third said he got life, and he killed every child in that orphanage.

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How do you get pikachu on a bus? You don't pokemon are fictional characters

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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