A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

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why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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