ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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