Knock Knock… Who is there? Orange. Orange Who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Actually I really wish you did, because I am Hypokalemic and am about to die you asshole.

what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? They were tossing frisbee and accidentally threw it into their neighbors yard.

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

how did they guy with no legs in the wheel chair walk? he couldnt because he had no legs.

Women's rights

What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

what do you watch ? a tv

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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