Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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How many band geeks does it take to catch a football? One, especially if he/she is on the football team.

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops