What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

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Tell me a joke Tell me a joke! TELL ME A JOKE!!! ...Womens Rights

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John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

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Why didnt your daughter come home? The door was locked

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why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

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Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

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You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a registered sex offender.

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A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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GINGER PEOPLE

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A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

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Yo mamma's so stupid she sits on the TV and watches the couch. :) By Drew Bolton

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Soooo... a black man walked into a bar and asked the bartender for a beer.

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A man walked into a bar. Ow!

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How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

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What did Spiderman do when he saw a crime taking place? He stopped it

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What's red and invisible? We don't know that it's red.

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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