What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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Society.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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