What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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What Does Alex J Simpsons Face have in Common with his hand? Spaghetti

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whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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