So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

Q) You know how I know your gay A) Cuz your gay

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

Bob fell off his roof.

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

Society.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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