From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

1 fish 2 fish red fish wait why is the fish red , oh I forgot I killed it

Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

what do you call a rat with wings? an evolutionary masterpiece

Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

Q: why did the cookie go to the doctor??? A: because he was sick

A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Why are Ethiopians so fast? Because antelope are also very fast.

Why was a refrigerator sitting on a part bench? Because someone set it there.

What time is it? Refrigerator

What happened to the man who just took a shit? He got a stunning pain in his anus because the earlier Hemorrhoid issues had now turned in to a open wound around his Anoderm.

A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

Q: Why did the policeman stare at the big-breasted victim? A: She was dead.

What's big and white?

Whats Big, black, and in your moms underwesar? A snake that escaped from a pet store which is causing a lot of commotion in the local community. Meanwhile your mom is getting drilled by a big psycho who escaped the mental institution. JMM

What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

Whats yellow and gives you cancer? The sun

Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

A black man walks in to a bar and says ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

UNICORNZ R PURPUL

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away." -Louis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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