why did the dentist quit his job because he had saved up enough money for his retirement

As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

What did Charlie Sheen say to Rebecca Black? If you care about the punchline I hate you.

whats fluffy and pink? -pink fluff whats blue and fluffy? -pink fluff holding its breath.

knock knock. Who's there? The delivery man.

A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

Q: why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A: because it was dead

There's a Korean Black person and a Mexican on a cliff who jumps first? Who Cares

A pink bird and a pink elephant was out flying. Then something happened.

What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

Why do people eat babies? Because they're delicious.

I don't know what was a bigger disappointment, the series finale of "Lost" or--sorry I thought I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

Why was the young black boy kicked out of his classroom? Because the manner of his actions were inexcusable.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a registered sex offender.

A man walks into town and takes a shit!

Q: why did the cookie go to the doctor??? A: because he was sick

How do you kill a cancer patient? Throw a fridge at him.

Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

why did the ginger get made fun of? because he had red hair

Why did Osama bin laden plan 9/11? Same reason Justin bieber was born....

(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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