i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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What do you call a black guy who kills people? A murderer.

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How do you drown a blond? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool!

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How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

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what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

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What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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why did the puppy poop? he had too

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Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

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a fat man walks into a bar and gets laughed at because his shoes are untied

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What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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Why is Tom Garrick gay Answer- Because he is

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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