Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because the light said don't walk

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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what do mexicans enjoy eating? food.

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How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

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What's worse than going in the wrong direkshun? ...My spelling

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Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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Shane Murchan is GAY ..... :L

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange. Orange who? The orange that can talk and knock on doors.

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

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What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

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what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

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At least I dont have AIDS.

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Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

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What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

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Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. Ok.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops