A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

slaughter the mussies #EDL

Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

I told you it would happen

An asian is driving a car. He observes the speed limit and uses his turning signals while switching lanes.

A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

sometimes i wonder why is the frisbee getting bigger? then it hits me

Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no legs.

Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

A man goes to a doctor and says , "My arm hurts in 3 places." the doctor says, "Dont go to those places.

What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

Why did the black guy hit his head while walking through a doorway? Because he was tall.

Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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