What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pancakes Ouch! That hurt!

Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

what do you call a cow? A cow

Apple.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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