When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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i hate anti-jokes ;)

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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69

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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