Have you ever seen Ethiopian food? No, neither have Ethiopians.

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

Why is Adam saying numbers? He is a maths teacher.

Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me Ben. You just told me to come over. We are going jogging aren' we? Oh ya, sorry. I forgot the time. Is it cold out? Ya, it is pretty cold. You should bring a jacket. Ok, let me go get my jacket. Alright, can u grab me a water please? Ya sure. Thankyou.

Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

What did the orphan wish for Christmas during world war II? Parents What did he get? Bombed.

what do you call a mentally and physically obese man? nothing until you know or obtain his name

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Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

Your mother is so fat that when she steps on a scale it shows her a weight that she is not very satisfied with

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

"what happened to the man that was walking along the cliff" he was found the next day dead with a seagull on his head.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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