What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"

What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

Why do all the Republicans hate Obama? He's a Democrat.

What do you say to man with no hands. How do you feel.

"what happened to the man that was walking along the cliff" he was found the next day dead with a seagull on his head.

How is pinocchio's nose like a penis? They're nothing alike.

what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

Two weeks ago, my brother walked into a flea market and asked if they sold fleas. He's so silly.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

Whats the easiest way to kill a blonde? Shoot her

"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

what do the Holocaust and Jeff Dunham have in common? they're both hilarious

Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

why did little suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock: Who's there? Not little suzy Why did the car crash? Little suzy was driving Why didn't little suzy ride her bike home? She died of her injuries from the car crash

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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