Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

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How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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you are a åsshole :)

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Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

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What did the fat girl say to the good looking guy? Nothing. She didn't have the self-confidence to go up to him.

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A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

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What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

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What did the homeless children get for christmas? Hypothermia

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raisin boogers

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

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She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

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Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

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I ponder

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What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

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What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

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What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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