Joe diragi is gayer than elton john

What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

What's worse than getting AIDS? Nothing.

Biggest lie ever; "I have read and agree to the terms of service".

"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" "I'm not quite sure, but your on fire."

Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

How do you get 100 Jews into a car? ...Nevermind, it wouldn't work.

How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

How many retarded mexicans can you fit in a smart car? Two.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Xzibit

A black man bought a large condom because he has a big penis.

whats the difference between black people and dogs? people actually care when something happens to a dog

BOTTOM!!!

What's worse then forced to eat frog legs? Xbox one

once upon a time there was a boy

Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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