What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

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Chuck Norris once walked into a strip club, and had quite a nice time indeed!

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Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

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Kevin was very nervous going into his job interview. So he pretended he was a salad and ate himself.

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What would Jesus do? Do? You mean like do it? You have a dirty mind.

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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Your mom.

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Q: What's small and can't read? A: A candybar

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He was brutally raped and killed, Inglewood is really not a place you want your children growing up.

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Two guys walk into a bar the third guy ducks

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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a hobo begs and begs for a dollar to buy something. a man finally gives him a dollar. what does the hobo buy? nothing. he walked into 711 and got shot.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Dylan is a person

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A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

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Q. Why does Samuel Jackson always play a black guy? A. Because he's black.

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a man is running away

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No, Trinidad.

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what's blue and goes blub blub? a blue blub blub

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a man walked into a bar ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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