Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

AIDS

What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

Two muslims walk into the bar, Everybody continues with their daily lives. One should not be judged by their race or religion as all humans on earth are as equal as one another and should be treated the same way..... And then the building blew up.

Theres a man with 2 eyes.

"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "You man the guns, i'll drive."

what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

hey

8================================================================================================D-------------------------------------------- It can coil!

Gianni

Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

Chuck Norris doesn't shave.

You are Nerochan right?

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? His health was dwindling ever since he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer several years ago and this looked like the end.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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