Why couldn't Paul see. He got stabbed in the eye by two mexicans

Why do they give old people Viagra at nursing homes? Because erectile function decreases with increasing age, and it would be unfair to needlessly deny senior citizens the right to consensual intercourse if that is what they want.

What did the preist say to the other preist? 'hey! we're both preists!'

-Knock, knock. -Who's there? -The pest control guy. -Please leave me alone I'm giving birth.

what's black? a lot of things.

wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

What did the Pornstar say to his wife? He concluded that a divorce was the way forward for both of them as, seeming as he was a pornstar, he was almost certainly having extra-maritial sexual intercourse, unhealthy for any working relationship.

Why was the man crying in prison? He missed his family and wanted to go home.

live or die you decide to late time to die

My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

the WNBA

What is worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? 1 dead babies in 10 trees.

Knock knock Who's there? Your neighbor. I just ran over your cat.

How do you fit a homosexual man into a small card board box? You cut him into pieces.

A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get in the car.

Why do black people enjoy watermelon? Because it tastes good.

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...