Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

That's what she didn't say

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

The bear woke up after his long hibernation of the winter. "Boy, am I hungry!" The bear wandered around and ate some berries. "These blackberries are too bitter and unripe for my taste, I'll go eat something else." He stumbled upon a honeybee hive and took some honey out and ate it. He was swarmed and stung by many of those bees. "That wasn't my favorite batch of honey, I'm still pretty hungry, let me go find some other food. He came across a cabin in the woods. "There maybe some food in there." To some, this was known as the Northern Vermont Massacre. It was a tragic happening. The 7 membered family, the Hernandez family, all died that day. The bear chase all of the adult and children and the house and brutally ate them.

TIMMAH!

im black

Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

What's big and messy? A big mess

A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

"33"

Q: What's white, black, and red all over? A: The yellow brick road

I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...