Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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Black people

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What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

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Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

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What is the difference between a blonde and a Mexican? Their hair color.

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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Women's rights.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

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A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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Little girl and a pedofile walk into the woods at night. Little girl says, "mr pedofile im scared" pedofile responds " you think your scared? i have to walk out of here alone."

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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A man had a blue hat, a yellow hat and a red hat. This man has three hats.

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Woman: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting Doctor Woman: Interupt- Doctor: You have cancer

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

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What is Lil Wayne's first name? Wayne

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Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

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why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops