Your mom is so fat...

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yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Moe: What's the difference between blue paint and red paint? Ben: I couldn't tell you, I'm blind. Moe was so embarrassed by his unintentional rudeness that he apologized to Ben and walked away.

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

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Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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When I walk in the rain, I get wet

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How do you kill a politician? You set him on fire and stab him in the back 20 times.

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Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

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Why did the black guy still have price tags on his clothes? He forgot to take them off.

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What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

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An Amish man walks into a bar. He then orders a non-alcoholic beverage due to the temperance practices of the Amish faith.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he's stupid.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red. OH SHIT THE GARDENS ON FIRE!

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it lost Consciousness.

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A jewish man, a black man, and a redhead walk into an electronics store. Because they work there.

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Why did the surfer surf in the ocean without a surfboard? Either he was mentally challenged, simply dreaming, a fish, or most likely did not have a surfboard.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

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Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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