What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves.

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

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What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

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How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

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Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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If you don't see any banners here, it doesn't mean they aren't here.

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Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

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What do you call a black priest? A black priest

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of school? Because he was poor academically.

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why did the cow eat the seahorse/ because my shift keys are broken1

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donald................duck for president

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What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

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Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

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Can you answer one question for me? Yes Thank you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Harry Styles

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How do you get someone to come out of the closet? Unlock it

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops