Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

Penis.

whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...